Meade County Messenger
Coming Home
By Kevin Hatfield
The dawning sun sparkled across the frosty grass looking out my kitchen window. The house was still quiet and peaceful as I reached for the coffee pot and began my day. The wind was blowing outside and I couldn’t help myself but to crack the door open just enough to feel the cold air. It was so crisp and clean as it blew winter’s edge through the doorway. Kind of refreshing it seems, unhindered in some ways, brutal in others. It’s been three years since I’ve felt this kind of cold. Three years since that cold chilled me to the bones. Aw… but what three years will do. But that’s the story isn’t it?
And when they had done all the things according to the law they (Mary, Joseph, and Jesus) returned to Galilee, to their own city of Nazareth to start a new life. And Jesus grew strong and in the ways of God. (Luke 2)
I lay awake that night, three years ago, about an hour before the shelter opened. I’ll never forget that feeling, waiting for the sun to rise so I could make my way from the rail yard to the shelter to get warmed up. Each minute passed slowly, I could hear the wind then too, but then it meant something totally different to me, it meant death. I couldn’t feel anything, but yet everything hurt in some way, almost frozen to my bed of boxes. My cardboard ‘house’ didn’t slow the wind down much, and many of my kind had lost this battle on nights like this. At dawn I walked best I could into the shelter’s warmth when I was greeted by a child no more than eleven with a smile and “Good morning.”
Good I thought and ignored her as I passed. “Good morning, sir!” again she insisted. “Did you see my button?” I turned to face her almost angrily and there it was, a button proudly proclaiming, “CLEAN the air, use kind words.” In bold green letters. I couldn’t help myself, I had to laugh, how ridicules a thought this was in my circumstances. A second ago I just about polluted it with profanity, but somehow this young girl reached into my frozen heart. You see I was a father once, before tragedy struck my life. That coupled with bad choices and no will to go on led me here today. Nothing to cry about, that’s just the way it is.
I moved through the breakfast line, but made my way back towards our door greeter just to hear the brightness in her voice. It was no problem finding a seat near the door. The air blew in every time it opened and nobody wanted to be reminded that soon we would all be back outside in the cold again. I watched her greet each person with the same enthusiasm as they entered. It didn’t even seem to bother her that we smelled bad. She was filled with so much joy, if she was nervous it didn’t show. I HAD to know; there had to be a story behind this button. So as I eat my grits and toast, I ask, “Where did you get that button?” She smiled the biggest smile and proudly proclaimed “Sunday School.” She began to tell me about kindness and how our words carry feelings. She reminded me so much of my little girl so long ago...
I left the shelter that day. I thought about what she told me about being kind and how our words carry feelings. Feelings… the more I thought about it the more I realized how long it had been since I had real feelings. I thought about this for a long time and finally let myself feel again. And when I did, the floodgates of old emotions came pouring out. I cried for most of the day. I thought of my little girl, that died so young, and my wife. Oh, how I missed them. At last, I settled in on the thoughts of how I got here.
That night I don’t think I slept at all. My mind raced through the years and times past. I barely felt the cold. I felt like I had finally found myself again. I couldn’t get over that little girl. Why was she there? Why was she so happy? Who was she? And that button “CLEAN the air, use kind words.”
The next couple of months were a whirlwind of change. It all began with those kind words from a little girl that encouraged me. After going through a series of shelters and half way houses, with some help from community programs, I found a place of my own. I started a job at the grocery store, stocking and cleaning at night. My world had flipped from homeless to hopeful all because of one little girl and a button.
As time went on I settled into a good position at the grocery store chain, and found myself managing a small store not too far from the shelter. I walked passed one day; I couldn’t believe how far my life had come since that cold winter morning. Now, when the cold wind blows, I think about how I got a second chance at life. That cold wind is refreshing now. Looking back, it blew in CLEAN air and one small girl.
Mary and Joseph left for Bethlehem but it was over two years before they made their way back home. And even though Nazareth was home to them now, their lives had changed more than they could have dreamed. Many of us make plans and goals that don’t turn out the way we hoped because of life’s circumstances. But the one thing that remains a constant, Love. Kindness in the story is an extension of a Love that can only be found in God. Kind words and actions can make differences in people’s lives. It creates hope, encouragement, and strength. As this Christmas season comes to a close and things get back to normal, I hope you find it unusual. By that I mean, I hope you’ve found Love. The Christmas gift of Love that God gave us in Jesus is a kindness that is meant for every heart to feel and to share. It’s my hope, it’s my prayer, that you have found your CLEAN air… in Love.
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